Stuntmen/Women Are Not “Shadows”

After reading the article on the internet about the complaint of Natalie Portman’s double, ballerina Sarah Lane, in the movie “Black Swan” and read the negative comments about her, I couldn’t help but sympathize with Sarah Lane. How would you feel if you’re not given credit for all the hard works you’ve done just so the other person, in this case Natalie Portman, could take credit for your hard work and all the expertise you had shown in the project that you mastered for years? And how would you feel if you’re told to shut up about your contribution to the project just so the other person could pretend that it only takes a short time to master your craft? It’s adding salt to injury for an honest and hard working artist! I’m not saying that Natalie Portman is not an honest and hard working artist, but since she actually tried to take credit for Sarah Lane’s hard work by not mentioning Sarah Lane’s name when she accepted the award, well, it’s up to you, reader, to decide if you could call what Natalie Portman did “honest”. I think the ones who made negative comments about Sarah Lane, just because Sarah Lane voiced out how she felt that her part in the movie was never mentioned, don’t value other people’s hard work and obviously have no respect for other people. Just because doubles don’t get mentioned doesn’t mean that it should be that way! I think it’s time for doubles to get mentioned and the hard works they had contributed. They may have accepted the part to be “someone else’s shadow” like one of the commenter’s put it, but that doesn’t mean that doubles are shadows! Stuntmen/women are people and they should be recognized for their talents. They’re professionals and should be treated as such. They shouldn’t be exploited like they don’t know their rights. It’s unfair of Natalie Portman to not mention her double’s name and the efforts her double made to make the movie more interesting. I mean, come on, give credit where credit is due. Personally, I don’t find “Black Swan” interesting. I don’t even think it deserves an award and I know for certain that I’m not the only one who thinks that way. One of the people who worked behind the movie, “Lord of the Rings”, said that if it was up to him the movie, “Black Swan”, wouldn’t even be made.

To those who haven’t yet read the article, here’s the link:
http://blog.movies.yahoo.com/blog/1000-natalie-portman-slammed-by-her-black-swan-dance-double

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“What’s your fondest memory of your dad?”

To my surprise, a very dear friend suddenly asked me that question. I was caught off-guard. But it’s really a good question. Strangely enough, I have never given it much thought until I heard that question. It took me a moment of pause before I could answer. I was thinking of good memories with my dad. I was surprised to realize that, somehow, I have enough good memories about him. It’s been years already since my dad passed away and whenever I think about him, I always wish he’s still alive. My dad, when he was alive, is always busy. He leaves home early and comes home late. We don’t get to see him that much until he got sick and was forced to stay home. That’s when I got enough time to talk to my dad. I saw him crying once. He told me that my mom was mad at him. He upset my mom and it upset him that my mom was mad at him.  He didn’t like arguments. I remember one time when my youngest sister and I had a quarrel; our dad called us both and tried to remind us of the line in The Lord’s Prayer: “And forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sinned against us…” My dad never wanted to see us quarreling with each other. My dad, in his own way, was very kind – a good person, I must say. I had a dog that I raised when I was eight-years-old. I personally looked after my dog since he’s a puppy and I spoiled him. One day, on my way home from school, I received the news from a kid who’s playing in the streets that my dog is dead. I was in disbelief. At first, I thought the kid was joking, but I saw in his face that he isn’t (‘and where would that joke come from if it’s really a joke?’ I thought at the back of my head as I ran home). I didn’t want to believe it because I had just seen my dog earlier that morning before I left for school. I hurried home, with a growing fear and anxiety building inside me, to confirm it. I remember being scared to know the real answer, but I put on a brave act and tried to smile as I asked my mom, looking her straight in the eye: “Is my dog really dead?” Then, to my horror, she said “Yes”. My dad was there, but I didn’t look at him. After hearing my mom’s reply, I could no longer keep the brave act so I ran to our room that I shared with my mom and dad. I was so upset. I was crying my heart out when I noticed my mom followed me, then my dad. I learned later on that it was my dad who asked my mom to follow me to see if I’m alright. (If in case people are wondering why my dad needed to ask my mom to follow and comfort me, I must explain that we are not emotionally showy people, so we might seem cold to other people that are observing from a distance, but we care about each other just like normal family do.) As to the whereabouts of my dog’s body when he died, my mom told me she gave it to the drunkards who asked for it. The drunkards ate my dog. My mom explained to me later on that she gave my dog’s body to the drunkards because she’s afraid that other animals would dig my dog’s grave if I request to have my dog be buried in our backyard. Yes, my mom is practical that way. I didn’t see my dog’s body. Maybe it’s for the best. My dad tried to comfort me by lending to me his Walkman. The Walkman was my dad’s favorite gadget, so I really appreciated his gesture. Those are some of my fondest memories of my dad. It’s my regret that I didn’t even tell my dad how much I appreciate him. Well, I really wished I realized how much I appreciate him long before he passed away. I hope now he knows. I miss my dad; I really miss him a lot.

Updating Blog

I know I haven’t updated my blog for so long even though lots of things had happened in my life.  And even though I promised myself that I will begin updating my blog months ago, I didn’t.  I have so many things going on in my head that I don’t know how to put them into words, actually. But now I think I should. Thanks to the people who subscribed to my blog, by the way. I didn’t expect it. But it’s a pleasant surprise. Again, thank you very much. I hope I won’t bore you.

Until my next post.

Yours truly,

Me

Why do some people with disastrous marriage try to convince single people to get married?

I’m not against marriage at all. I’m, in fact, pro-marriage. It’s just that I don’t understand the logic of married people with disastrous marriage when it comes to settling down. They complain about their marriage, complain about their cheating spouse, complain about their spouse running away and leaving them with someone else, but recommend single people to get married.

While I agree that, ideally, it’s good for a person to settle down, it’s not something that should be done just for the heck of it. Some married people look at single people with a feeling-sorry-for-single-people look and try to “console” single people by saying, “don’t worry, being single is also okay” without being asked. Doesn’t that sound condescending? Also, don’t they realize that they don’t serve as an inspiration to single people to get married? I rarely hear happily married couples bring up marriage to a person who’s single and try to pressure that single person to get married. Sometimes it makes me wonder why unhappily married people are the ones who keep bringing up marriage more often to a person who’s single, especially if that single person is in his(her) late 20’s. Single women are the ones who get mostly bombarded and pressured with words like, “you should get married”, as if the only thing a woman needs to do is pick someone at random and get married. I mean, hello, what are they thinking!

Random thoughts: What if I decided to be a relationship guru?

I wonder how many clients I would have. Would it be a good way to make a living?

It’s just a thought that occurred to me because I know some people make a living out of giving “love advice”.

I never claimed to be a love guru, yet I have people asking me about what they should do to keep their relationship strong, or what made their relationship fail, etc. So I jokingly thought to myself, “What if I make a living out of giving love advice, how much would I make?” But, of course, since I am very generous by nature, I always feel inclined to listen and share my wisdom to them, and give them the advice and feedback they needed for free (okay, I was kidding on the wisdom and the generous by nature part. But I’m generous when it comes to sharing my opinions and insights, that’s very true).

The whole session takes a lot of time, I wonder how much I should begin charging for it… hmmm… per hour maybe (again, just kidding)? But free or not, I can’t guarantee that by taking my advice the person would have a good and happy relationship next time, or in the future. In fact, if the person really takes my advice, it’s more likely he’s going to end up alone and stay alone. But the good thing is, not only alone – but content to be alone. And I think that’s the beauty of it – the contentment. But as I said, I can’t guarantee that that would surely be the end result, because like most things in life, there’s no guarantee. Who knows if after taking my advice the person ends up miserably alone? What happens to the person after listening to my advice is beyond my control.

I do everything that I could do to render any help I could afford. I actually take time listening and digesting information for hours, to consider all aspects before I give advice. I always try to put myself in other people’s shoes first so that I can effectively feel and internalize what they’re going through. Those steps are very important procedures for me to give sound advices and suggestions. After all the internalizing, I always tell the people who seek my advice about what I would do if I were them. Whether they would actually do exactly what I would do or not, it’s up to them. What I really want them to do is learn to appreciate the beauty of their own company… to appreciate solitude.

Here’s a very good quote…

“Only in quiet waters do things mirror themselves undistorted. Only in a quiet mind is adequate perception of the world.” ~Hans Margolius.

Beautiful, isn’t it? What I was trying to say is a person must learn to still and calm himself in the quietness of his own heart… to get to know himself and appreciate himself, so if worse comes to worst, and he really ends up alone, he’d still find himself at peace and assured. Some people act like they couldn’t live without being in a relationship so they’re always on the lookout for a new prospect as soon as they got out of their previous relationship. It’s like they’re looking for some sort of validation. It’s a vicious cycle. I’ve encountered people like that and actually talked to some. They often tell me how they feel used and taken for granted, yet, they’d do the same thing over and over again, and cry about it over and over as well. The truth is no one can use you, if you didn’t allow yourself to be used. My take on that is stop playing the victim and take responsibility for your own actions and decisions. It’s also another way of learning about yourself. It will make you a strong person, you’ll see. ;)

“Courage! I have shown it for years; think you I shall lose it at the moment when my sufferings are to end?” – MARIE ANTOINETTE

Marie Antoinette – What a very brave woman…

It’s unfortunate that she had to meet a tragic end.

Whenever I read articles about Marie Antoinette I can’t help but marvel at the strength of her character – her silent yet evident and notable bravery she had shown during the reign of terror. Not even for a single moment did she lose grip of her sanity nor lose grip of her dignity as a queen. She serves as an inspiration to me and hopefully to others who will take the time to really make a research and know about her real story. She was a woman of virtue and she had proven it until the end.

Prayer and Work (Ora et Labora)

Ora et Labora is a Benedictine Motto. When I was little, I didn’t fully grasp the full meaning of it, at least not by my heart. I either pray or work instead of pray AND work, and most of the time I don’t pray at all. I met a very prayerful Baptist in my first year college, and he’s very talented. He has lots of potentials. He told me that before he works on his projects, he prays first. I laughed at the thought. I must admit, it sounded a bit weird to me. For a Catholic it shouldn’t sound absurd, but it did to me because it’s honestly the first time I heard of it (probably because I wasn’t practicing Catholic back then). It’s not my habit to pray actually, so it’s not that I intend not to pray, I just forget to pray. Now, I’m beginning to practice praying and working at the same time, and it works. I am more productive than I have ever been. I love the kind of work I have now, and I thank God for that.  Sometimes I run out of concepts, but this time whenever I do, I pray to God, and almost instantly, the ideas rush in my head like a tidal wave.  Now I know what St. Benedict meant when he said prayer and work.